Learnings during our Pre-Cana Seminar

Last Sunday, Martin and I attended our first ever Pre-Cana Seminar. This is one of the requirements of the Catholic Church prior to getting married. According to Wikipedia, Pre-Cana is derived from the verse of the Bible; Wedding at Cana where Jesus Christ turned the water into wine.

As husband and wife for more than three years, we thought we already know each other that well. Na we are doing our part 100%. But we are wrong, super ang dami namin na-realize when we attended the seminar. And ang pinaka masaya dun is that we were able to appreciate each other more. 🙂

The talk is done by The Family and Life Ministry Coordinators, Mr. Sam Uy and Mrs. Marina Uy. Nakakatuwa yung sharing nila about their married life. Hindi talaga Happy Ending ang Marriage, it is a consistent work-in-progress, a Lifetime Partnership and a Commitment not just to your spouse but also to God. Alam ko, parang hindi ako yung nagsasalita, pero kasi after attending the session parang it made us a changed person e, alam nyo yun? Mas na-appreciate ko talaga ang asawa ko ngayon and mas naintindihan ko ang roles namin pareho. I’ve also realized na mali pala talaga ang mag-expect ka na magbabago yung partner mo for you. Instead of asking GOD to change him, we should ask GOD to help us adjust sa sitwasyon. Diba? Parang mas madali nga naman yun.

When it comes to our children, it taught us na kahit naman hindi kami biyayaan ng madaming anak e it does not mean na hiwalayan na namin ang isa’t-isa. Kasi nga naman we decided to get married because of one thing: WE LOVE EACH OTHER. So bakit nga naman maghihiwalay kung hindi magka-anak hindi ba? (Kaya Steph, wag ka na daw ma-sad kung hindi ka mabuntis agad.) Tsaka I remember a post from Mommy Fleur’s blog, na dapat talaga yung spouse natin ang lagi natin inuuna. Kasi sooner or later mag-aasawa din yang mga anak natin, they will have their own life and family. Sa ayaw at sa gusto natin, hindi na tayo ang magiging priority nila pag tumanda na sila. Pero ang mga asawa natin, whether we like them or not andyan lang sila sa tabi natin. Kasi that’s what we promised e, diba? ‘Til death do us part. Pero, let me make it clear, hindi naman ibig sabihin nun ay pabayaan na ang mga junakis natin. Syempre hindi ganun yun. We have to take good care of them kasi nga they are God’s gift to us. It’s God’s way of saying na he trusts us to take good care of his children, to be the stewardess of his creation. Kaya we should also take good care of them and love them unconditionally. Ang bottomline lang naman is that even if you guys already have kids, you should not let your whole world revolve around your kids alone. Aminin kasi nating mga nanay, we have the tendency to ignore and take for granted our husbands pag meron nang mga anak kasi syempre iniisip natin is that mas kailangan tayo ng mga anak natin more that our spouse. Pero mali pala yun, isang nagiging reason ng failed marriage is that lack of communication and quality time with the spouse. Dapat once in a while we’ll have our quality time, simpleng movie, kaen sa labas, tamang CoCol (Coffee-Coffee lang) diba? Yung ganun? I figured out na between sa aming dalawa ni Martin he’s more thoughtful when it comes to mushy things like this. Ako kasi si OC e. Like I have na plans for the weekend, hindi pa nagsisimula yung week alam ko na yung dapat ko gawin by weekend. Kaya pag nag-aya yung isa decline ko agad kasi nga I’ve already planned for something else. Kaya pala minsan parang mas masaya sya pag mga friends namin yung kasama nya kasi parang at some point I became a boring wife. 😦 Pero aminado naman ako dun. Kaya nga we are very thankful that we were able to attend the seminar kasi mas naintindihan namin yung role ng isa’t-isa.

Kaya for soon-t-be-married couples out there wag nyo baliwalain yung Pre-Cana Seminar na yan. Super helpful yan sa pagiging buhay mag-asawa ninyo. Trust me. 🙂

Martin and Steph V2.0 #121915

So it’s final.

We’ll have our Church Wedding on the 19 of December this year. (insert happy face here)

I did not brag about it too much because 1) mahabang entry yun for sure and I don’t have the luxury of time to do that. 2) Nakaka-stress pala talaga ang mgprepare ng Wedding no? Seminars, Workshops, file ng kung ano anong papers dito at dun, and then interview with the Priest. 3) Hindi pa finalize yung list ng suppliers ko. 😦

But then, once in a lifetime lang naman tong Wedding namin. I mean, pangalawang wedding na pala namin to. The first one was in 2012, it was a civil wedding. And then we planned the church wedding this year but sa super busy namin ay (unfortunately) hindi ko masyadong natutukan. So yeah, mejo ngarag ang peg ko po.

Why did we choose to get married again? Honestly speaking, it was not really us who wanted the Church wedding. Considering kasi na we have Saab na and we have a lot of gastos e sasabay pa ba namin yung engradeng kasal? Diba, practicality wise na lang. But then again, bilang isang practicing Catholic ang Nanay ko sympre pinush nya yun. She told us kasi na iba talaga if may blessing na ng Church. Isa pa, I’m the eldest daughter daw and of course dream ng parents ko na maihatid naman ako sa altar hindi ba? Martin naman is the only son so syempre once in a lifetime lang din yung maghahatid si Mommy sa altar. Oh well, in short we gave in to what they want. Hindi naman sa ayaw talaga namin pero syempre may mga bagay lang kami na kino-consider. But then, dahil mahal ko ang mga magulang ko and I also wanted our marriage to be blessed e pumayag na kami. 🙂

Our My chosen date was on the 19th of December. 19 kasi is my favorite number, and it is actually the day after Saab’s birthday 🙂 Ang galing nga e, kasi Dec 18 2010 ko naging crush si Martin then ayun yung naging birthday ni Saab. Tapos after 5 years and 1 day, we’ll have our Church Wedding. Awwww everything’s falling into place. ♥ I shared it with Martin and okay naman sa kanya yung date. Ang lapit sa pasko at birthday ni Saab 🙂 triple celebration to in the coming years.

But the real stressor is, hindi pa nga kumpleto yung suppliers ko. anong petsa na?!

For Catering services we have My Precious Events. Our contact person namin is Jaimee Lee Maniquis. She is very helpful and mabaet to talk to. I met her once for the food tasting I’ll blog about the food we chose on a separate entry. It also includes the Lights and Sounds plus the 2 layered cake. Pero I’m having second thoughts pa sa cake kasi I think 2,500 is mahal. What do you think guys? hindi pa yan Fondant cake ah. Let me know if you know someone na nag-be-bake ng wedding cakes na affordable ang price. Feel free to comment or send me a message. 🙂

My Gown – The original plan talaga is for me to look RTW gowns in divi, but again weekends lang ang freetime ko and super kulang ang time namin every weekends because of household chores. So since I am so bright and practical I looked and searched online. For sure meron mas magaganda and mas maayos na wedding gowns out there. So yes! I got it from OLX, and according to the owner (Giselle) hindi talaga nagamit yung gown sa wedding, it was just used for a pictorial. (Perfect!) So there. Check na ang wedding gown ko, it just needs some dry-cleaning and alterations and we’re good to go. I’ll not show the pic here kasi I wanted it to be surprised. Simple lang sya guys as in simple lang. 🙂 Ang important naman kasi is not the gown, but it’s the sacrament of marriage itself duhba?!

For the Church – We chose St. Maria Goretti Parish in UN Avenue. I wanted to have it sana in Paco Park but I find it a bit pricey, so we looked for other options. Every girl yata is dreaming to have like a big and grand wedding but not for me. I don’t know, I feel kasi na hindi naman importante kung gaano ka-bongga ang wedding mo e. At the end of the day, you were able to celebrate it with the people who loves and supports your relationship. Simple lang the church, hindi sya ganun kalaki kasi we invited lang around 100 guests and hindi kasi maganda sa picture if hindi puno ang simbahan.

from templorum.hub.ph

from templorum.hub.ph

This is how it looks like from the inside :) nice naman diba? I can imagine placing the cherry blossom trees sa gilid ng aisle :) photo source: preciousjoy.blogspot.com

This is how it looks like from the inside 🙂 nice naman diba? I can imagine placing the cherry blossom trees sa gilid ng aisle 🙂
photo source: preciousjoy.blogspot.com

Theme – Ang theme will be rustic and vintage. Ayan ang uso ngayon. The chalkboards and vintage features ang in na in ngayon. 🙂 I have several ideas in mind and here are some cute photos I found from pinterest ♥

May Love Story timeline kami :)

May Love Story timeline kami 🙂

I like this idea kasi it’s simple yet classy ang dating. 🙂 And speaking of simple, the chalkboards? So mura lang in National Bookstore, paano pa kaya sa divi? hihi I can’t wait to go to divi with my BFF.

I love the idea of the hanging pompoms :P hihi

I love the idea of the hanging pompoms 😛 hihi

The Motif – I chose teal and coral. Idk , I find those colors so relaxing. Before, my idea of is to have blue and orange but I find the colors too strong e so I stick with teal and coral instead.

I like to be hands-on sa wedding namin. Kasi aside sa malaki ang matitipid namin is mas magiging memorable sya. We still have a lot of things to buy and to arrange. As in madami pa but I am really trying by best to compose myself and gather my thoughts. Breathe in, breathe out talaga mga beks. I’ll have updates once in a while and if you have suggestions if you also love to do DIY’s please teach me how. I’ll be so happy to learn. ♥

Love lots,

Steph

It was never really Love at First Sight

November 2010

They met as new colleagues at work. Her first impression for him? Too Obnoxious and Arrogant. His first impression for her? Quiet person, a woman with few words. Or, he thought so. She does not really liked him at all. The way he talks and acts seemed to be annoying for her. “He’s too loud. Too disturbing. Not my type of guy.” She said.

It was December of the same year, December 18, 2010 to be exact. It was the night when she suddenly realized that this person whom she calls Arrogant and Obnoxious would actually make her fall head over heels. He was wearing a white top that night and for some reason, she has a thing for guys who wear white. He looks so unblemished and good-looking. Very far from what she thought of the first time they met. For an unknown reason, they started talking, then sending each other messages through text andFacebook, then talking on the phone everyday, and then every night. Until they felt that there’s something magical that connects them.

2011

It was not a fairytale kind of story. They started the relationship with a bumpy road. There were crossroads, tears, stop signs, a Yellow Big Bus that’ll hit you so hard. They were both in a relationship when they realized they already fell for each other. But they were both afraid to try again and give love a second chance. They were in their comfort zones and they are so careful of their hearts being broken again. They were so afraid to get heartaches from each other.

But then again, the magic of their love conquered every obstacle. After a lot of cryings and wrong decision-makings, regrets and trying. They decided to take it to the next level.

October 3, 2011 – The day that both of them could not ever forget. It was a rollercoaster of emotions. From shouting to talking things over and deciding what to do next. And so they both agreed, all relationships will not be perfect. No matter how rich and good-looking you are there will always be problems. It’s not going to be easy. They will – whether they like it or not will hurt each other unintentionally. Besides, nobody’s perfect.

Fast forward to April of 2012

They were like any other couples, they fight, they laugh, they travel together, they talk on the phone all night, they go out, they had a lot of misunderstandings on where to eat and to eat or not. Until one day she found out that she’s pregnant. “It was scary at first”, she thought. A lot of questions were asked inside her mind. She was scared, really scared. And when she told him, he could not believe it. He was staring into space for a few minutes. What was he thinking? She does not have any idea. But he looks more scared than she is.

Eventually it synced into their hearts and soul that they will become parents anytime soon. But then again, fate is frolicksome. Her pregnancy was not easy, she underwent an Operation because of abnormalities in her ovaries. But the happiest thought she’s holding onto is that she has both of them now. Therefore she needs to stay strong and live for them.

August 31, 2012

They both decided to get married for the first time. A Civil Wedding was held on her 25th Birthday. And as she looks back and reflect on her life goals, everything is falling into place without her even knowing.

She’s working with one of the best Companies in the Philippines, she was able to exercise her passion in teaching, and she was really enjoying her work. And now at the right age – the age where she pictured herself getting married to the man of his dreams it seemed like the wind whispered it to fate. It happened.

After a few months, a darling baby girl was born.

December 18, 2012

Exactly 2 years after the night she saw the Guy in sparkling white top. They were blessed with a healthy baby girl. And they named her, Isabella Sophia. (Isabella – Hebrew; God’s promise/Sophia – Greek; Wisdom) She was the apple of everyone’s eye. A smart, and charming baby girl who completes their world. They both adjusted to the challenges of parenthood. They fight as married couples, they back-up each other, they were each other’s strength and weakness.

Fast forward to the Present Day;

As I was typing our love story, I could not help myself but wonder how magical our Love Story was. Maybe we were unaware but it was fate which led us to where we are heading now. Our Love Story is not perfect nor it was always merry. But the funny thing is that, whenever the other is ready to give-up, the other one is not ready to let go. And maybe, just maybe that is the reason why we are still here together. Holding each other’s hand, kissing each other’s cheeks, and going home to where we should be – in each other’s arms.

PS

You may visit our Wedding website where this story is originally posted.

Thanks for visiting!

Funny Friday

A short conversation with Hubby earlier this morning

Martin: Babe, ang laki na ni Saab no? Pwera usog.

Me: E sayo nakuha ang height e.

Martin: Buti na lang.

Me: Pero sa akin nakuha ang talino.

*End of Conversation* 🙂

Happy Friday everyone!

My Take on Marriage. The Ups and Downs and the Sweetness in between.

Last Friday Hubby and I got into a fight. Just like any other couple, we’re not perfect. We have our shortcomings and flaws. We yelled, said hurtful things towards each other and in the end we realized that we can’t give up just like that.

“I love you even when I hate you. Only married couples can understand that.” – This is just one of the many quotes that I love to live by. This is from the movie, Crazy, Stupid Love.

But this is true most of the time. Right Mommies? You may say you hate your husbands or wives for one or two nights but eventually you’ll find yourself in their arms again. I have learned from that fight that my Love for Martin has grown more than I expected. Yes, there will be times that I would hate the way he snores at night, or the way he hangs the towel after bath, even the way that he cuts his fingernails. But these are just small things compared to the love I have for him.

Married Life is not easy. It is not going to be easy and smooth-sailing. You will have the Ups and Downs. The Bumpy roads. The roller coaster ride. But in between those imperfections, lies the most important thing that a couple should do.

  1. Learn to compromise. One way or another, someone has to give way and understand. But then again, it’s not going to be the same person ALWAYS. Wala naman mawawala if magbibigay ka diba? Lalo na if you know na ikaw yung nagkamali. Minsan din, LISTENING is helpful. Lalo na siguro sa katulad ko na talker. Yung tipong, sasagot pa lang sya e may kasunod na kong itatanong at irerebutt.
  2. Choose your words. Napaka hirap gawin neto lalo na pag galit ka. But then again I believe that we are all      responsible for our actions and words. Wala naman mawawala if we’ll try to bite our tongue before we let go of what we’re about to say. Try to remember the vow you had during your wedding day. Na mamahalin mo yung taong kaharap mo, aalagaan, at hindi sasaktan.. sa kahit anong paraan. Of course, we don’t want to hurt the people we love right?
  3. If all else fail, Pray. Hindi ako perfect example na Catholic. I don’t go to mass every Sunday, but then again I always make sure that my personal relationship with GOD is still there. Pag sobrang down ako at problemado and I felt that my husband does not love me anymore (dala ng period at PMS) I pray. Nagkukulong lang ako sa kwarto and I look for the prayer booklet that I have. Pero mas maganda pag tatahimik ka lang and listen to what your heart is saying. Lift all your worries and problems to GOD. Siguro this can also be the best time to think and have your me time. Promise, after a few minutes or hours okay na ako ulit. I already have the courage to talk calmly to Martin and sort things out.

Hindi talaga madali and buhay may asawa. You guys will fight no matter how perfect your relationship may be. There will be problems and heartaches. There will be tears and yelling. There will be people who will test your marriage and faithfulness to each other. But always remember, lalo na sa panahon na gustong-gusto mo na mag-impake at umuwi sa parents mo. Try to remember the day you said “I do”; try to remember the vows and promises you made to each other. Try to remember yung feeling na super excited ka pag makikita mo na sya, the kilig moments. The HHWWPSSP (holding hands while walking pa-sway sway pa) at the mall. Try to cherish the laughters you had when you had your first kiss. ♥ Those stuff, yung ganun. O diba, it made you smile. 🙂

I remember I was ranting last Friday na pagod na pagod na ako. Na I felt like I was the only one na gumagawa ng lahat. Then he said, “Then stop doing it for me kung napapagod ka na.” nagulat ako sa sinagot ko.. I told him “Hindi pwede. Hindi ko ppwede itigil yun kasi yun yung pinromise ko sa’yo nung kinasal tayo. Promise ko pagsisilbihan ka diba? Habangbuhay..” sabay iyak. I realized kasi, for me iba talaga ang vow sa marriage e. Kumbaga, one way lang sya. Di ka ppwede mag U-turn. Kailangan talaga you’ll be brave enough to take all the consequences it will bring. Tapos, I cried lang after that. Siguro dahil na din dun sa sinabi ko, it made him realize na kailangan din e alagaan nya ako, na hindi lang dapat yung mga wives ang magaasikaso sa mga husbands nila.

Ayun, the next day we went out on a date. 🙂 ♥♥♥

Sakto din na Saab went to my Mom’s house so may quality time kami mag-asawa. We went to Robinson’s Magnolia and we watched The Love Affair – saktong-sakto lang din kasi tungkol sa mag-asawa and family yung movie and I like the moral of the story. Isama mo na din na ang galing galing galing at ang ganda ganda pa din ni Dawn Zulueta at Richard Gomez umarte. 🙂 Sana you guys were able to watch it na, maganda talaga promise!

And then of course, we were back to our normal selves. 🙂

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Kailangan lang talaga minsan e may quality time kayo mag-asawa. Yung tipong kayong dalawa lang doing the things you used to do when you were mag-on pa lang. Kahit nga staying at home and watching DVD is okay na e. At least you guys can still talk apart from your finances, work, kids and other problems at home. Diba? So there, I hope you guys learned something. And being a newbie in this married world, I would really love to hear your thoughts and stories to share. 🙂

Have a Happy Monday! ♥